Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Victoria is Not the Only One with a Secret!

I have a little secret. 

I also have issues. Or, maybe I just have a computer that hates me. I've been fighting with my computer since my last blog. Actually, it started with the blog you were not able to read, because I accidently deleted it! ARRRRGGGGGG. I was minutes away from finishing it. Just had to make one little adjustment. It was all because that dumb mouse was not cooperating. It didn't go where I wanted it to, it highlighted too much stuff. I suspected the little ball needed cleaning out, but I couldn't figure out how to get it out of the mouse. (I know I've just given you too much information about how my brain functions. Don't judge me too harshly!) Anyway, losing my blog made me lose my blogging mojo, and it has taken me all this time to get it back. At least, I hope it's back. Then, yesterday, as I sat down to check my email blog, the computer froze up. I pushed all the buttons I thought needing pushing. I pulled out wires I thought needed pulling, but to no avail. When Hubby called that night, I told him the problem. "Just unplug it. That should do the trick." Yep, that took care of the problem. Now why didn't I think of that?? 

Now, back to my secret. This past weekend, daughter Jennee, told me we would be going to a Victoria Secrets VIP after hours shopping trip. OK. That sounds like fun. I need a few things.

We walked in, showed them our invitations (that were printed off the computer), and our ID, so we could be entered into the raffle drawings.
My number was 40; Jennee's number was 41. 

We entered the store, and the sales girls were all decked out. (Hubby asked if they were modeling underwear. No. They were not.) The new color of lipstick must be fire engine/neon red, because they were all wearing the same color. Their lips came into the room five minutes before the rest of them. (I'm sorry to report that most of them looked ridiculous.) Some of the girls had a big trayful of cookies, which they begged us to eat. Others had trays of little water bottles, complete with a lovely photo of a model wearing a bra. The male MC was making announcements that free bra sizings were available (aren't they always free?), and reminding us that we should be measured every six months to be sure we are wearing the correct bra size. That was a little weird.

The drawings were to be every 15 minutes. The number for the first drawing was 42! Darn! So close! The number for the second drawing was 39! Darn, again! The numbers were dancing all around us.

We finished our shopping and decided to hang around for a few more drawings. As I was looking at the makeup, a lady came up to me and asked if I would be hanging around for a while. I answered, "Yes, probably."  "Well, then, here, you can have my ticket. I'm leaving."  (Yay! Thanks!)

I decided to put ticket #40 in my left pocket, and ticket #77 in my right pocket. I couldn't be seen fumbling around with two tickets in case I won. The trick was to remember which number was in which pocket. And, with my memory, that's asking a lot! 

Two more drawings came and went, with the numbers not being close at all to our numbers. Finally, we were getting bored. I mean, how long can you keep wandering around looking at the same underwear over and over? We decided to stay for one more drawing.
The time came. The number was called. "Seventy-seven". "Whoo hoo", I heard myself yell. Then immediately had to stop and think which pocket contained the correct ticket. Luckily, I guessed correctly and went over to claim my prize.

"You've won this lovely tote bag, which is a $50 value, and a makeup bag, a $10 value." 
"Great, thanks", I said as I started looking over the tote bag, and wondering where I would use it. The bag is nice, but it is covered with black and white photos of the models. Maybe it's just me, but the last thing I want to carry around is a bag covered with photos of scantily-clad perfect-bodied women. (I suspect my male readers may have a different perspective.)
But, a plan was forming in my mind.  Since the bag is black and white, I decided to dress the models myself, with my handy-dandy black marker. I felt like I was getting to know these girls pretty well. I finished with one photo, turned the bag around, and said, "Not you again!" , and colored some more. Luckily, I had a big supply of black markers. Jennee says I've ruined the bag. I don't think so, because now I can actually take it out in public.  


  1. I can't imagine wanting a bag like that either. haha

  2. Goodness, what a strange day you had!!! I agree that the tote bag was not a very nice giveaway, but maybe you like the other stuff? Is the computer behaving for you now? I finally got an iPad, and it's great, no more mice or anything!

  3. Hope your computer is behaving itself again now! I was rather disappointed to see that you didn't give your pink boa an outing at that Victoria's Secret event. You would have knocked the models into the shade by cavorting around in that! Well done on winning a raffle prize, but I agree with you,not the sort of bag you would want to go to the shops with. You might start getting strange looks!!

  4. Congratulations and I love what you did with the bag. Ingenious! You're funny. I hate those bright red huge lips too. Great post.

  5. cute story. glad you won something after sticking around so long. funny it is a bag of scanty clothed young ladies ;)

  6. I loved the reference to their lips entering the room ahead of the rest of them! Fun to win even if it wasn't your 'cup' of tea!

  7. I still can't believe you ruined the bag. You were supposed to give it to me...remember...I invited you to the VIP party...I drove you....

  8. You two are funny! Congrats on your drawing. Great idea.

  9. Red lipstick is NOT for everyone, is it? LOL

    Hilarious post! I wonder why they think anyone wants to carry around a tote bag with nearly nude models on it? To attract dogs...I mean men? LOL

  10. I wouldn't carry around a bag like that either. I'd probably use it as a giveaway or something. But your method works too!

  11. I knew you would win! I agree who would want to walk around with pics of models on their bag...wearing underwear no less! I would have colored them in too!
    Blessings, Joanne

  12. Hello lady! Yes I'm back also! Put my mom on the plane this morning and finally stopped crying long enough to catch up on some post! So glad I came over here because I laughed my butt off. I'm the same way with computers. They boggle my mind. grrr. As for the drawing on the bag... hilarious! Love it.

  13. Say, do they still sell cassettes of classical music there? I suppose it would be CD's nowadays. or is it mp3?
    Anyway, I always have wierd (at least to me) computer problems. For a week I could not comment on blogs, even my own. Some Cookies null thing(?). A friend worked on it twice; so far I'm okay.
    Enjoyed reading this post.
    Thank You.

  14. Total marketing FAIL. Somebody isn't on the ball for marketing research. A sharpie was definitely the best defense. Glad you had a good time with Jennee. You two are a real hoot.

  15. Darlene, you are so jolly funny! Everytime you put up a post, I know I'm in for a great read. You're always entertaining and your posts are frequently thought-provoking, too. I love your blog! Super pics of you BTW. Yep, I agree about the bag needing a makeover...except I probably would have just given it away. You get full marks for being inventive :)

  16. Not too sure who would be comfortable walking around with a bag of scantily clad anyones.... I know what I would think if I SAW someone walking around with a bag covered in scantily clad someones ~ nothing good!! You're clever to come up with a way to make it work for you!


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